I was a kid when the Tamagotchi craze hit, and I was always envious of my friends and cousins who got to hand-rear their little digital babies.

A Tamagotchi is a beep encased in a plastic shell.

It’s a cute pink bauble not much larger than a gumball, with only three buttons to manage.

This means that if you grope around for your beeping child in the dark and start pressing buttons at random, you have a decent shot at addressing its immediate concerns without turning on a light.

Still, the Tamagotchi Mini offers the exciting prospect of watching a garbage LCD screen shift pixels around in the semblance of a near-indistinguishable form with eyes and a mouth.

My small adult son beeps at me in the morning when he wakes, beeps at me every couple of hours when he wants to be fed, and, most inexplicably, he beeps at me when he’s going to sleep.

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